Saturday, April 17, 2010

Return to Ceraland

Ceraland has always been one of my favorite spring races. I’ve done this race several times before and I always look forward to it. Today marked my return to Ceraland after a 4 year absence. This return also marked a 4 year anniversary of one of the defining moments of my life.

I can remember it like it happened one minute ago. The cardiologist walked into the recovery room and said “No more racing. You have non ischemic dilated cardiomyopathy. I’m prescribing beta blockers and an ace inhibitor”.

Oh my God! Wtf?!?!? What the hell does that mean? First I mourned the loss of racing. Internet research quickly proved this should be the least of my concerns. The Framingham study said I would be dead in 5 years! Why, why, why, why me? Don’t I have enough health issues with the never ending allergies and sinus infections? How can it be possible that my heart is failing? Much angst ensued.

I researched and researched. Despair ensued. Then I stumbled on a link to an athlete that had DCM but had been cured. The method of healing was controversial, unconventional. It required faith and forgiveness. I felt I had the former. I was not sure about the latter. I pursued it. I forgave the 6th grade bully that picked on me. I went through my life, discovered I had a lot to forgive. In forgiving and in faith in God and Jesus, I found healing. Some may say it was time that gave me this healing, some may say it was the meds, but I know, this was not the case. I have no doubt as to the method of healing.

By God’s grace and healing, I returned to racing in 2009 and raced at Ceraland today. I struggled to finish, suffered like a dog, but managed to finish. It’s been a long, strange, fantastic and life changing journey to get to back to Ceraland.